It Was Over

You said it was over
But I don't want it to end
We said it was over
Now it's so hard to pretend


You said it was over
Leaving my heart bleeding badly
We said it was over now it's so hard to fake it to my self


Laughing in the outside
Crying in the inside
How I wish to speak my mind
It seems I'm not broken but my heart has fallen into pieces
Oh, I can't tell me lies anymore



You said it was over
But I don't want it to end
We said it was over
Now it's so hard to pretend


You said it was over
Leaving my heart bleeding badly
We said it was over now it's so hard to fake it to my self


If only I could convince my self that you were reasonable
If only I could silence the doubts that crowds my mind
If only for one last time I could lose my self in the heaven of your eyes



You said it was over
But I don't want it to end
We said it was over
Now it's so hard to pretend


You said it was over
Leaving my heart bleeding badly
We said it was over now it's so hard to fake it to my self


Now it's so hard to fake it to my self...


The first English song I have ever written. I wrote this when I was in first high school. I know, I'm so cheesy. Ha Ha!




YenPating18 © 2012

One Day by David Nicholls

This book is one of my favorites. It made me travel time with friends that I learned to love through each turn of the page.


David Nicholls showed great writing skills through his amazing work with how he manage to write from past to present. The story line of the characters was excellently written.


I read One Day for 3 days for it is quite long. But it was really a good thing since Nicholls made Emma and Dexter be my friend. He did not just introduced them to me but made me think that I am part of their friendship and love for each other.


Em and Dex, Dex and Em, are two very different people that had become the best of friends. Emma Morley, a witty, intelligent and liberal girl. Dexter Mayhew, a greedy and arrogant playboy.


Their story started after the graduation of Dex and Em in 1998 and continued for the next twenty years in every 15th of July which they refer to as St. Swithin's Day. 


Dex and Em's friendship through time showed how it can sometimes be for better and for worse. They've had fights, arguments and how Em couldn't take Dex's irritating habits and selfishness anymore. But their friendship developed into something more than what friendship is, they've provided each other a family and a companion who knows them really well, who can see the real them through all the posturing and who can be prank when they are lying or being ridiculous.


I would describe the novel as an intimidatory tale; an image of how we often fail to know what really love is, on how we mistreat and fail to nurture it. An alarming way to present on how we never let ourselves act from the heart and just feel free to go with the flow. 


The story line of these two amazing people was really unexpected and daring. And I wouldn't want to speak more of Dex and Em's story for I don't want to take away from you the experience of getting to know them through David Nicholls amazing book.


I recommend this book for all those who want to be in a journey of friendship and love. Two thumbs up for this one. I agree that this one is bound to be one of the MODERN CLASSICS. 


YenPating18 © 2012

The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

This book was the first book that I've read written by Stephen Chbosky. I must say the book was fun and easy to read for it's like a diary. Actually, it was a  collection of letters written by Charlie to an anonymous friend.


I think Stephen Chbosky wanted to make the reader feel as if he/she was the one who received those letters from Charlie. As for me, he succeeded in that. For he managed to introduced Charlie to me step by step and made me know his character.


The book was a about a boy named Charlie who's entering high school without his best friend who committed suicide. And his adventures through all the life of a teenager.


It explores a wide variety of teenage realities such as rape, drugs, drinking, suicide, sex and homosexuality. 


As I read the book, I didn't notice that I was close to finishing it for it had a lot of story and things going on. 


I specifically wanted to know more about what would happen between Charlie and Sam. And see what will happen to everyone in Charlie's life, like for example to his sister.


I expected a lot from this book since it is now a being turn into a movie. But in the end it was just a 3 star for me. I think the book was flawed due to the lack of exploration through the flow of story. And the book had layers that you really have to peel off in order for you to understand its story and intention.


But I enjoyed the fact that it's an epistolary novel. Well, I don't really liked reading a novel that looks like a diary but it worked for me with this one. 


As for the character, I found Sam to be a very interesting and exquisite character. And as for her brother Patrick, his story line was unexpected. Well, I had hints of him being a homosexual but it was totally unexpected who his partner was.


And the book gave me the feeling that I was there when it all happened and that I was a part of Charlie's adventures. 


As for Charlie, Chbosky made me think he's this shy wallflower but in truth there is more to him than being that.


I really liked how Chbosky managed to explore the pressing problems that the teenagers are facing. And how he managed to show his intention for Charlie's character in the end.


I would recommend this book as a good read for it was full of fascinating scenarios. The book was a little flawed. Maybe because in the end you will have too many questions and will ask for more than what the book could give. 


I really did enjoy the book enough that made me read it for only two and a half hours. The book had some depth and emotional parts that affected me. Well, I must say I really did learn a lot of things through this book. I just didn't like the fact that it tried too hard to comment on many social issues with a very short outcome. Hence, I still look forward on how the movie would turn out.


YenPating18 © 2012

The Guardian by Nicholas Sparks

This is my favorite book written by Nicholas Sparks and without a doubt his finest.


I've read this book in a span of 2 days because I couldn't put the book down. At first, I was expecting the typical romance book but then it had surprised me with its suspense and nerve-wrecking plot. 


I'd say that this book is very different from the "Nicholas Sparks" style of writing. Why?


Well, aren't all of us, if not most of us thinks that it'll be all about boy meets girl then someone will die? Most of his books were written that way. Some people find his style a little bit ordinary  but for me his books are more than pieces of paper bind together. They bring you to a journey with life's reality. 


I specifically loved this book because of the friendship between Julie and her dog, Singer. Singer embodied many things such as bravery and love. 


Bravery; no matter what situation he was in, even when he was about to die he still defended Julie from Richard. And that wasn't the first time he defended her. He will put Julie's safety first. He was a real Guardian.


Love; for Singer mend Julie's heart for her longing of her dead husband. He was more than the "man's best friend" he was Julie's companion throughout the ups and downs of her life. He filled in the space in Julie's  heart. His love for Julie was so selfless he saved her up to his last breath.


Julie and Singer's friendship was the reality of loving someone despite his irritating habits and the truth that no matter what happens, love will always prevail. 


I cried when Singer died not only because it was a very tragic ending for him but also because upon reading this book, Nicholas Sparks made me know Singer. In every turn of the pages my heart move closer and closer to Singer. He made me love a fictional dog. 


I would give this book two thumbs up for its daring characters and its ability to make a reader ask for more.


YenPating18 © 2012

A Certified Motherfucker

MOFOS is a group of Legal Management students studying at San Beda College Alabang. These people are crazy, wild and adventurous. I am one of them. 


When I entered college, I wasn't really happy with the fact that I'm studying in a school that is thirty minutes away from home. Well, for most of you that would really be convenient. And yes it is, but I wanted to be "free"  from my parents watchful eyes. Do whatever I want and live independently. Sadly, my parents wanted me to attend this school.


So on my first day, although I am ready to go off and meet new people I was scared to death at the same time. For I knew NO ONE. 


To make the story short, after a few weeks of spending lunch together and talking to each other, I met these people and we formed the clique named MOFOS.


You may be asking why in the hell did we named our group after the word "Motherfuckers", but I really don't know why. As far as I could remember, Cheska was the one who started calling our group MOFOS.


On the first weeks of our friendship there was a lot of drama happening. Probably it's because we are still adjusting to each others mood swings and habits. There was really some petty drama between girls and even with boys. But as for now, every thing is in smooth sailing.


Well of course there are still some arguments and fight in our group but, it is really more mature now. Unlike before, arguing  about something someone said on Facebook. Now it's more on how a person acted or how is he/she being such a pain in the ass. We all try to be mature  and calm now. 

Fun Day with MOFOS

This was our first hang out when we went to Ayala Alabang Town Center. Unfortunately, we were not complete that day. 


Well, as you can see we played Lazer Tag and it was fun! We really hope to do it again but it's really expensive for a thirty minute game. So instead of wasting 170php for a game, we would rather eat or watch a movie or hangout at someone's place, buy DVD's and EAT.

Being stupid together is FUN

This was us taking pictures through David's Macbook. We love doing this every time David would bring his laptop. Or we would just watch something that David downloaded. 


It's fun whenever we use some crazy effects of David's laptop. We always end up being the loudest group laughing and shouting at our school's gazebo. 

David's Birthday

This was us when we celebrated David's Birthday at his place in Inner Circle BF Paranaque.
It was really fun that day and David's aunt made some sushi rolls and pasta. The food was good since they own a catering company. I'm not sure if it's a company. 


I specifically enjoyed the party when we mingled with David's high school friends and we played a card game. It was like "magic" for David's friend used the card to see the future. I know, it's not magic or what but it was fun especially when we asked crazy  questions such as "Who is the one who's good in bed?".

Run for the Pasig River 10-10-10

This was the time when our P.E. professor required us to run 10k at the Run for the Pasig River last October 10, 2010. 


That event was really tiring especially for the fact that I haven't slept or event eaten anything. So I was really cranky when our classmate, the one who is coordinating us, doesn't even know  what to do. I ended up shouting at her. 


So back to the run or maybe we should call it the WALK. 


We managed to finish the whole 10k race for 4hours. I know, it's really embarrassing when we got to the finish line there was NO FINISH LINE. And the people attended the event scattered everywhere, we don't know where to go! We couldn't even find our P.E. professor!

Benj's Birthday

Obviously this was the time when we celebrated someone's birthday and it was Benj's. I don't really remember much about this day. Only that we took a lot of pictures and the cake was so good.


It was a simple event. We just had lunch, spend some time talking then there goes the clicking cameras and cellphones.

Drinking session @ NLOS

This was the time when we went out to drink. It was at BF in NLOS Bar. This was our MOFOS CHRISTMAS PARTY.


We had shots of Hitler and Adios Mthrfckr. Well, in the end all of us got a little tipsy. Luckily, no one was wasted. Those drinks were hard but the good thing is that it's HANGOVER FREE.

Movie time @ Daniel's crib

We watched a movie named I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE. The movie was totally inhumane. We really don't know why but every time we pick a movie that is not so "famous" it'll end up crappy or weird or really have no sense at all. 


Well, this night was fun especially for the fact that they have a pool, but we didn't get in. We had no spare clothes. But we ended up splashing each other. I was so drench with pool water. Luckily, Cheska had a spare shirt and lent it to me.


When we all went home, it was late and I had an argument with my dad. 

Mara @ 18

Mara's 18th Birthday was a lot of fun and the food was good. We celebrated it at Mara's place in Alabang Hills Village. 


It was really fun when the boys danced with Mara for her 18 roses. And when we all gave Mara some messages for the 18 shots.


We celebrated her birthday last February 19, 2011 but her real birthday is on the 17th. So on that day, we surprised her with a heart shaped mocha flavored cake and sang the birthday song for her at our school's gazebo. I even made some tiny paper scrolls with our messages for her and put it in a box.


Mara's 18th was a blast!

Paolo's Birthday

This was the time when we celebrated Paolo's birthday together with some of our classmate at his place in BF Resort. 


The food was so good especially the rice. It has some fish paste, mango and egg. We also had some booze and had shots.


We played beer pong. I ended up getting a little wasted for I'm not a fan of beer. 


In the end, some of us slept over at Paolo's place. Some went home, including me. 

A group of crazy people who love each other <3
(c)  Ernest Ardiente

As you can all see me and my friends had some great adventures together. These are not all of it but these are some of the memorable ones. 


I really love this people, they were always there through my ups and down. 


We are totally and completely different from each other and it's a mystery on how we managed to maintain a strong friendship like this especially with all the drama and differences. 


These people are not just my friends, they are my family. They gave me more than companionship, they gave me a place where I can be whoever I want to be and be accepted.


Through them I'm having the not only best college experience but also the BEST LIFE EXPERIENCE.



YenPating18 © 2012

The Bull and The Shit of the World's Mind

Most us would agree that there was a time in our lives that we felt MISUNDERSTOOD AND MISTREATED. It can be when we're in school or even at our own home. 

Most of us felt like CRAP. Because we let them made us feel that way. We let them made us into a “nobody-gives-a-shit-about-what-i-feel-because-i-am-failure” person.

We may even have thought that we will never be enough and no matter what we do no one will truly accept us. Some of us found a way to “defend” ourselves against this situation; looking out for my own. Most of us had this way of thinking that the “fittest” is the one who will “survive” but, I say NO to this.

Why?

If that really is the case, NO ONE WILL SURVIVE. For no one is TRULY “FIT” TO SURVIVE.

We may think that this person or that person or that he is or that she is better than anyone and that this or that or he or she is able to “survive” the world we live in but, the truth is we will NEVER TRULY KNOW.

A person may seem strong, smart, clever, skilled, influential, and etc. But A PERSON IS JUST A HUMAN BEING. That person we think who is the best or the most awesome ever can be just a little kid inside.

Every one of us have strengths and weaknesses. It’s up to us to find it and nurture it. But the sad truth is that, most of us thought that it is by being “THE BEST”.

We always classify the world with the BEST and the WEAK. We were the ones responsible for having to think that there is always a qualification for being a HUMAN BEING. That it’s either “I’m a loser or a self-absorbed jerk that get’s everything I want without any effort” and that the “reality” is that NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT ANYTHING UNLESS IT’S FOR THEIR OWN GAIN.

Well, here something every one of us has to ponder…

What did I ever do to be in this situation?

What made them hate my guts?

What do I do that’s enough for them to see I’m worth it?

Why did I fail?

Why did they leave me?

Why did I ever feel like this?

WHY DID I EVER LET THEM MADE FEEL LIKE A CRAP WHEN I KNOW I AM NOT?

WHY DO I THINK THAT NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT ME?

WHY DID I EVER COMPARE MYSELF TO THEM?

We were the ones who made ourselves compare it to others and feel like a crap about it because of our egos and prides.

We were the ones who made a mistake for them not to trust us.

We were the ones who are responsible for our actions and not them.

We were the ones who acted on our own will, nobody forced us.

We were the ones who let go.

We were the ones who first hated and criticized ourselves.

We were the ones who made us think and feel like a crap and we let them see us that way. We let ourselves self-destruct.

EVERYONE GIVES A SHIT, WE WERE JUST TOO STUBBORN FOR ASKING MORE THAN WHAT THEY COULD GIVE.

But the truth that nobody really understands is that there is always someone who will never fail to understand us and that is HIM. So the next time we tell ourselves “I am not of worth” just look above and remember what he said “IF THE WORLD HATES YOU, REMEMBER THAT IT HATED ME FIRST.” 


YenPating18 © 2012